Naughty Mum!!!

Dyl - I heard her. She said a very naughty word. Apparently it was in disbelief about the results of my latest running and jumping exploits. We went to one of those showey things again this weekend. It was a VERY long way and we had to get up really early. When we eventually arrived Mum let us have a run around the field and Taz went for a poo! (why doesn't he do it at home in the proper manner, we have a lovely toileting facility that I always use) Some horrible little Sheltie came up and was growling at poor Maggot, Mum had to step in quick before Maggot told it to %%%% off! Mum threw Tazzie's poo at it - that'll teach it hehehehe. My Mum always looks after us and will jump in quick to protect us so we don't get ourselves in trouble. Perhaps I should poo when we go out so she has something to throw at another dog if it starts picking on me.

Tazzie went to go running and jumping first and when he came back he said it had all gone ok but that Mum had smelt funny. He thought that perhaps she was a bit more nervous than usual. I asked him why but he didn't know - stupid dog he should pay attention, I expect she was looking out for that Sheltie and was worried because she didn't have any poo to fling at it. Anyway next it was my turn and Mum did indeed smell nervous. I looked for the Sheltie but it wasn't there so I tried to make her relax by just being my usual self. Both Tazzie and me got an 'E'. Mum was very pleased with us.
Next time Mum was much more relaxed and I tried very hard but she said some very strange things to me as I was running - I don't know what she meant perhaps she'll teach these new commands to me when we go to the barn tonight so next time I'll know.
Then we had another round - and I must say that there was STILL NO CHICKEN at the end of the dog walk. Anyway I went as fast as I could - apart from that dog walk thing, I don't like it, I've fallen off 3 times and if there's no chicken why on earth should I go fast!!!! Mum was very pleased; as always - (it doesn't take much to please her you know)
We had a bit of waiting around to do then and then a man came up to the car and spoke to Mum and that's when she said the very rude word. From what I can gather, I think I was the fastest dog around the running and jumping, it seems to mean a lot to Mum and we got another one of those rosette and trophy things which she immediately stuck in my face and said 'look what you've done!' Then she gave me and Taz lots of chicken. I think I must have done something right, I wonder what it was!
Apparently I've gone up another grade - still don't know what this is but perhaps there's chicken at the end of the dog walk in this next grade! Yay Chicken. I love chicken.

Where's My Shrekkie Monster?

Dyl - Well we've been doing lots of 'proper' agility over the past few weekends. Mum keeps appearing back at the housey-thing-on-wheels with rosettes and trophies - I really don't know what they're for but it seems to please her when she gets one. She always sticks it in my face and says 'look what you've been and done again!' Aparantly I've gone up a grade now; whatever that is. I'm wondering if it means I get more chicken at the end of the dog walk - there seems to be a distinct lack of it in these competitions. I think someone should tell the person who stands in the middle and waves their arms about that there's no chicken at the bottom of the dog walk.
Anyway- the thing that's worrying me this week is what has happened to my Shrekkie Monster? I have a little toy -(that I have to share with Maggot) and Mum has pinched it! I took it outside and dropped it in our toilet area. I peed on it a few times, so Maggot didn't want it but he didn't seem to care. However, it made Mum want it. She took him away :-( and put him that funny machine that fills up with water and then spins. Why would Mum want him? She gave him to me in the first place and then took him away - hmmmm I might have to start guarding things if she does that a lot.

Oh I have just seen him on the washing line, Mum has pegged him out by his ear - poor Shrek, I bet that hurts nearly as much as when I bite him. Mum saw me looking at him and said that she has washed him as he was very smelly and that it will be much nicer for me now. Nicer? what does she mean nicer, I thought he smelt lovely and now I will have to chuck him around the garden, roll on him, dribble and pee on him again until he smells just right!