Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!

Dyl: OMG, OMG, OMG!!!!! I heard her. I heard her on the phone booking an appointment for me to go and see the vet. I don't want to see the vet! Why can't she take Taz instead, he's always moaning that he doesn't get to go anywhere - well he can go there! I don't like the vet, he pokes me around, and sticks things in very inapproriate places. I even emptied my anal glands on him last time but that still didn't stop him. I shan't go! I shall place my bum firmly on the floor and refuse to go in. She'll have to drag me in and I shall watch very carefully for any chance of escape. If anyone leaves the door open, I shall be gone and back in the car in an instant - you won't see me for dust. If she thinks I'm fast at agility - she aint seen nothing yet I can tell you. I'll show her what fast is!!!!
OMG why is she taking me to the vet - I'm fine, look Mum I'm running around all happy and well and playing with my toys - I obviously don't need to see the vet.....................please?


Well it's a few hours since I wrote the above and we have been to the vets!!! I was really happy to be in the car, Mum usually takes me to nice places and I thought we were going to the canal. When I got out the car..........OMG it was the dreadful vets, I immediately tried to get back in the car but Mum was too quick and had shut the door. I tried to run in the opposite direction but ....bugger!! she had already got my lead on and there was no escape. I made her drag me in, and once inside I kept trying to get out the window. Then a man came in and I was so frightened that I wet myself, but Mum still didn't take any notice of me; and then it was our turn :-(

The vet wanted me on the table and after he had had a chat with Mum (who was going on about snakes re-aligning their mouths - I ask you what is this woman on?) he started opening my mouth and looking around. He touched my sore bit and I just wanted to run away. He said that there was some blood around my tooth ( well whoopy doo I could have told him that) and it seems that I have cut my gum and possibly got a slight infection in there. Mum said something about yoghurt pots. The vet then gave me some treats....hmmmmm treats, I love treats.
And result, my puppy dog eyes, weeing and squirming must have worked, because he didn't stick a pointy thing in me. He gave Mum some tablets for me, I've got to have 1 twice a day, I wonder what they taste like, can't wait to have my first one......Maggot can't have any they're all mine!
Then Mum started talking about worms. Worms. Worms, for goodness sake I don't have worms, I am a highly tuned athlete, athletes don't have worms. However it would appear that apparantly I do, because Mum wanted some more sweeties that the worms can eat. I don't want worms......if you don't give them sweeties Mum, they'll go away. If you start giving them treats they'll want to stay. She really does have a lot to learn about training.